


Done Deal

by molossiamerica (afjakwrites)



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: M/M, everyone is an asshole to arthur lmao, jealous arthur is the best arthur, literally just more fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-17
Updated: 2018-08-17
Packaged: 2019-06-28 12:41:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,265
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15707439
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/afjakwrites/pseuds/molossiamerica
Summary: Things quickly go awry when Alfred pretends to date Arthur’s elder brother.





	Done Deal

“ _Seriously, Arthur, you’re gonna love him! He’s Scottish and his accent is so hot, plus he’s witty and sarcastic so you two’ll definitely get along. Trust me, you’ll like this one.”_

This is what Arthur’s best friend, Alfred, had told him over the phone two days prior when he’d asked if Arthur would have lunch with him and his new boyfriend. Arthur had been skeptical, as he always was when it came to Alfred’s partners—the American had terrible taste in both men and women, really, and Arthur had made his distaste for all of Alfred’s previous lovers known immediately. And, despite Alfred’s insistence to the contrary, Arthur was sure that Alfred’s newest boyfriend was no different from the countless others who had been entirely wrong for his best friend in the past. He hadn’t even bothered to pretend he would give the American’s latest fling the benefit of the doubt—he’d told Alfred that he would go to lunch, but that he highly doubted that this new one was as great as Alfred made him out to be.

“ _I really like this guy, Arthur,_ ” Alfred had said then, laughing a bit. “ _At least try to be civil for my sake. Please_?”

And Arthur had sighed into his phone and forced himself to sound nonchalant despite the pang in his heart. “Alright, fine,” he’d said with an artificial laugh.

“ _Thanks, man. See you Friday_!”

Alfred had hung up then, leaving Arthur to toss his phone onto the couch and run a hand through his pale hair. God, he hated meeting Alfred’s new partners. It didn’t matter to him that they never lasted long—every second Alfred spent with them drove a knife through Arthur’s already damaged heart. For years he’d been forced to meet lover after lover of Alfred’s, all the while he’d harbored secret feelings for his best friend. He comforted himself with the notion that he was still top priority to Alfred—in fact, Alfred had ended things with many of his partners after they’d expressed distaste for Arthur. Still, the American continued to date frequently, bringing countless men and women to meet Arthur. Arthur was quick to come up with reasons for his disapproval, most of which Alfred easily dismissed—but when things inevitably ended, he’d always admit that his best friend had been right. Arthur hadn’t the heart to tell him that half of the reasons for his disapproval had been of his own invention when, after every breakup, Alfred would rest his head on Arthur’s shoulder and smile sadly, saying, “ _at least I’ll always have you, Artie_.”

Arthur knew it was wrong, of course. It was sick to take pleasure in the knowledge that, as long as Alfred was single, he’d have the younger man to himself. Arthur was ashamed of himself for it, berated himself over it every time another one of Alfred’s relationships ended, but he couldn’t bring himself to admit his feelings to his best friend. He was far too afraid of what would inevitably happen: Alfred would be disgusted with Arthur, refuse to talk to him, and they’d fall out of touch. If Arthur admitted his feelings for Alfred, he ran the risk of losing Alfred forever—a risk he simply wasn’t willing to take.

Thus, Arthur found himself outside of Alfred’s apartment that Friday with an artificial smile on his face and a repeating mental mantra in his head: _this fellow will be just like all the others. He won’t last more than a month._

Alfred opened the door and beamed at the sight of Arthur. His sunny smile went straight to Arthur’s heart as per usual, improving the Brit’s mood tenfold. He was ushered into the house by Alfred’s strong hand on his back and had to physically will himself not to melt into the familiar touch of his best friend. Alfred took his coat and tossed it onto the couch, then led him into the kitchen.

“Alistair’s in the bathroom but he’ll be out in a second. Help me set the table?” Alfred asked happily.

“And here I thought I was a guest,” Arthur laughed as he picked up a bowl of potato salad and brought it out to the table. “Alistair, you say? You know, that’s my brother’s name—that doesn’t look so good for him.”

“Well, his last name is Kirkland, if that makes it any better. Funny coincidence, isn’t it? He thought it was cool that my best friend’s last name was Kirkland too—said it meant I must’ve been looking around for the right Kirkland!” Alfred laughed aloud, but Arthur was staring at him in horror.

“Alistair Kirkland?” Arthur repeated. “You—You said he was Scottish, didn’t you?”

“Yeah, why?” Alfred asked, gazing at him with confusion.

“How old did you say he was?”

“I didn’t—he’s in his thirties, I think. Dude, you’re acting weird, are you—“

“He doesn’t have red hair or green eyes, does he?”

Alfred was staring at him with wide-eyes. “Dude, do you know him?” Then, a realization seemed to dawn on him and his jaw dropped. “Oh my god, are you guys related?”

Before Arthur could answer, the sound of a door opening and then closing was heard and then a voice all too familiar to Arthur sounded.

“Alfred, has our guest arrived yet? I’m anxious to meet this—“ Alistair stalled in the doorway, eyes immediately falling upon Arthur. “…You’ve got to be fucking kidding me.”

“What the fuck, Alistair?!” Arthur cried immediately.

“Wha—what are you yelling at me for?!” Cried Alistair in return.

“First of all, what the hell are you doing in the states? Second of all, why the hell are you standing in Alfred’s kitchen?!”

Alistair worked his jaw. “If you must know, Arthur, I’m in the states on business to determine whether or not I’m going to make a permanent move here or not for the company! And second of all, I’m here because I’m in love with Alfred!”

“Wha— _in love?_!” Arthur cried loudly. “How long have you two known each other?!”

“About a month, but I know we’re meant to be!” Alistair said, hooking an arm around Alfred’s waist and tugging him closer.

“Wha—You’ve been here for a month and you didn’t tell me?!” Arthur shouted, then looked to Alfred. “You’ve been seeing my brother for a month and you didn’t tell me?!”

“I-I didn’t know! We hadn’t really talked about his family or anything!” Alfred cried, raising his hands in surrender.

“I-I can’t believe this!” Arthur cried. He was practically shaking with rage at the sight of Alistair’s hand resting so familiarly at Alfred’s waist, their hips pressed together. It was infuriating, knowing that his elder brother had been with Alfred in ways Arthur had only dreamt of. “I’m sorry, but of all your lovers, Alfred, he is by the far the worst one you’ve ever had me meet! I can’t accept this!”

Alfred bit at his bottom lip and looked nervously between the pair. “Well, that makes what I was about to say a little harder…”

“What?” Arthur demanded, feeling dread descend upon him immediately.

Alfred and Alistair looked at one another, and then Alistair reached out and took Alfred’s hand in his. “I’ve asked Alfred to marry me and move back to Scotland with me if I can’t move here.”

For a moment, all Arthur could do was stare at the pair, completely incredulous. His green eyes were practically bulging out of his head, his jaw dropped. It took all he had not to scream at the top of his lungs—his brother and the love of his life, for Christ’s sake! He settled for yelling instead, gesticulating wildly at the pair as he shouted.

“You two hardly know each other! You’ve been together a month and you’re getting married?! Alfred, have you gone absolutely mad?! No, no, I can’t accept this! Damn it, Alfred, you can’t really be thinking of going through with this, can you?! You’re really going to pick Alistair?! Out of everyone you could have, out of all the people, you’re going to marry my brother, who you’ve only known for a month?!”

Alfred looked helplessly at him. “Why shouldn’t I? I love him!”

Arthur threw his hands up in the air, positively enraged. “Why shouldn’t you?! Christ, I can name a thousand reasons why!”

Alistair frowned. “Fine, then! Lay it all out on the table, Arthur! My fiancée,” he said the word pointedly, seeming to know it would anger his brother, “and I think it’s best for you to let it all out before the wedding!”

Arthur’s head practically exploded. “Don’t you dare call him that! Alfred is not your fucking fiancée! He’s an idiot making a mistake which I intend to fix! You two are rash and impulsive and you have no idea what you’re getting into—“

“Oh, come on, Arthur! What’s the real reason behind this?!” Alistair goaded, a glint of mischief in his eyes.

“You want the real reason?” Arthur shouted. “Fine! I’ve been Alfred’s best friends for six years now, damn it, and I’ve been mad for him the whole time! And if you think for one second that I’m going to let you of all people have him without a fight, you’re an even bigger idiot than I thought!”

At this, both Alfred and Alistair paused, wide-eyed. Then, much to Arthur’s shock, Alistair doubled over, laughing hysterically. He’d brought both hands to his stomach and was bent over, guffawing loudly.

“Wh—don’t you fucking laugh at me!” Arthur shouted.

“Oi, Arthur, it was a prank! Alfred and I aren’t really together!” Alistair wheezed.

Arthur’s eyes widened and looked to his best friend, who was staring at him in shock. He didn’t seem to find the situation nearly as funny as Alistair, simply gazing at Arthur as if he were seeing the man for the very first time.

“You’re in love with me?” Alfred asked.

Arthur’s face went red. “You’re not marrying my brother?”

“No,” Alfred said stupidly. Then, realizing he needed to explain, he elaborated. “I met him in a coffee shop on Wednesday by chance. When we realized that we both knew you, we decided to play a prank on you and pretend we were getting married.”

“…Oh.” Arthur said, unbelievably embarrassed.

He suddenly felt like running out of the apartment and never turning back, if only to escape Alfred’s burning stare. Usually Arthur could read his best friend like a book as Alfred wore his heart on his sleeve, but now his expression gave away nothing of his emotions. His eyes flickered rapidly over Arthur’s face, his brows furrowed in thought as though the Brit were a math problem he couldn’t solve.

Arthur didn’t have to know exactly what Alfred was feeling to know that he wasn’t wanted anymore. The American wasn’t saying a word, a clear indication of his distaste, so Arthur turned and headed for the door. The last thing he expected was for a familiar hand to take his wrist, stopping him. He turned back around, wide-eyed. Alfred was staring at him looking equally surprised, as though he hadn’t meant to do it.

Then, Alfred’s surprise melted away and a soft, affectionate smile came to his face. Arthur felt a wave of relief wash over him, along with confusion. Alfred was smiling at him, but why? Was it possible that Alfred felt the same way? Had he been worried for nothing all this time? No—Arthur quickly denied this line of thought. Alfred was far too good for him, would never see him in that way. There was simply no way.

And yet, Alfred’s smile only grew and he reached out, a tan palm grazing along Arthur’s strong jawline before settling at his cheek, cupping it gently. Arthur’s heart skipped a beat, and then another, and then another. He could hardly believe what was happening.

“Artie…” Alfred murmured softly, sweetly. “How come you never said anything?”

It took Arthur a moment to realize that he’d been asked a question, so distracted by the gorgeous man in front of him. He’d never seen Alfred look like that in all his life—that in and of itself was a shock to his system. He’d long prided himself on knowing Alfred better than anyone, thinking he’d seen Alfred in every state the American could be in. But this—this was new. This sweet, surprisingly gentle man with that something that was so foreign and so familiar to Arthur.

“I didn’t want to drive you away,” he said after a moment, looking down.

Alfred gently guided his face back up and smiled at him. “You could never.”

The Brit blinked. It was like Alfred was speaking in tongues—nothing that was happening made any sense to him. Did that mean what Arthur thought? Could Alfred really love him? Was this real?

“Alfred, do you…?” Arthur trailed off, unable to get the words out for fear of Alfred immediately rejecting them.

“Are you daft? O’ course he loves you! Don’t you pride yourself on being the smart one?” Alistair interrupted loudly, making both men jolt.

Alfred laughed. “What he said.”

Even Alistair’s presence couldn’t ruin Arthur’s good mood. He tugged Alfred closer and kissed him as he’d longed to for so long, humming with delight when Alfred’s strong arms tugged him closer. God, they fit together even better than he’d imagined. It was perfect—absolutely perfect.

When they pulled apart, Arthur looked to Alistair and then back to Alfred. “I’d better be the only Kirkland you date.” He warned.

Alfred grinned. “Deal.”

**Author's Note:**

> originally posted to my writing blog @afjakwrites on tumblr


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